What’s Love Got to Do With It? Part 2

Studies show that marrying for financial gain greatly decreases the likelihood of a lifelong love, according to Parrott.


“You are marrying money. You are not marrying a person,” Parrott says. “Anybody that is going to say, ‘Yeah, I want to be married to a millionaire,’ is just saying, ‘I want to be married to a certain lifestyle, and this person is just a means to that lifestyle.’ Marriage was never meant to be a means. It’s an end.”


Many understand how money affects their lives and their relationships. Some people believe that marrying a multimillionaire will eliminate such problems.


“It doesn’t matter how much money you have,” Parrott says. “You still fight about money.”


Parrott has given seminars to groups of millionaire men and has heard firsthand how money still affects their relationships. Many of these successful men work very hard to build and maintain their economic ventures. If a woman comes into this situation thinking that this man will be focused on her, she could be in for a rude awakening.


“Money is the No. 1 source of conflict in marriage,” Parrott says. “There is no doubt about that. There is more fur that flies in marriage over finance than any other single topic.”


For those of us who still believe in the notion of building a marriage rather than winning one, there is help. Parrott, who has authored 10 books, including “Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts,” says that there are imperative elements to preparing yourself for a lifelong love.


A couple must first dispel the myths of marriage. The first myth, according to Parrott, is, “Everything good in my life will get better and everything bad in my life will disappear.” Marriage is not some magic pill and holds no such guarantees.


The second myth is, “My spouse will make me whole.” Many people believe that their partner will make up for all of the things they are lacking. According to Parrott, they believe their mates will erase the pain from their past or be a shortcut to personal growth or maturity. This just doesn’t happen.


Parrott also outlines the key personal components to marital readiness. The first key is personal readiness. A person needs to get emotionally healthy before he or she can get married to someone else. The second key is relational readiness. This involves mastering communication and conflict resolution skills.


As for the fate of the instant television marriage on Tuesday night, Parrott puts it in terms the millionaire can understand. “I would not be investing on the side of success in this marriage.”


Sayles refuses to budge from her stance. “It is as much a flip of the coin in this situation as any. The rich will marry somebody anyway. Why not you?”


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